we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
I forgot how hot balto sounded
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
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