Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
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