then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
