Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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