Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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