Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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