yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
Found the puke drawer
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Randomize