When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
Randomize
