I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Randomize
