There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
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