I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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