drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Randomize
