Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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