i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize