well I can't set my house on fire every night
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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