we have officially mastered the walk of shame
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
