she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
