i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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