whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
