My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
