i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
Houston, we have a blender
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Randomize
