i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Randomize
