And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Randomize
