i think i have herpe
just one?
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
