Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Randomize
