They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Randomize