well I can't set my house on fire every night
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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