a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
