Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Randomize
