Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
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