i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
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