tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
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