Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
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