Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
Randomize
