Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
Randomize
