I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Bang-toberfest begins!!
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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