I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
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