Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize