yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
