he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
Randomize
