No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
Randomize
