got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize
