it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
