and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
Randomize
