my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
PANTIES FOUND
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
