Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
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