i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Randomize
