Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
Randomize
