it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
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