I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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