Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
